In case I forget.


And the beat goes on
June 24, 2007, 4:21 am
Filed under: Dr. Neuro B, Dr. Psych, Fear, Mental Health, RX

Ladi dadi di. Ladi dadi dum.

Dr. Psych codes me for “Major Depression” and “PTSD”. Words words words.

Drugs drugs drugs. I tell her I can’t take the Risperdol. She offers me another a-typical. I tell her I don’t want it. She is concerned about my sleep problems. She offers my Ambien. I tell her I’ve read the studies. Those sleeping pills are big marketing bullshit. I tell her a swig of NyQuil works better than the bigPharm drugs for a good night’s sleep.

She says that the Effexor doesn’t seem to be doing what I need. She says we need to try something else. I agree. How about giving up and just going down as far as it takes? I don’t tell her this of course. Those sorts of things concern psychiatrists. She says she wants to switch me to Lexapro. You know, I actually have a friend who went through a very black depression that was dramatically improved with Lexapro. I don’t even care. I don’t think any drugs will work. I think there are TOO DAMNED many drugs already. I took my pill box with me and dumped out one day’s worth of pills in my hand. “Look at this! I swallow all these every day!”

So the tapering off begins. Now I have to take 5mg of Lexapro a day in addition to all the other stuff. She said to come back in 10 days. She will probably increase the Lexapro and decrease the Effexor at that time.

My hands have started to tremble. I have sores in my mouth. I’m worried about the Lamictal. I go back in about a month to Dr. Neuro B and I’m afraid that these are both due to the Lamictal. I’m terribly worried that if I tell him that he will take me to a lower dose or stop it all together. I can’t deal with the seizures getting bad again, with being out of control again with the one thing that is getting better slowly but surely. I know that 900mg a day is a very high dose. I’m not willing to give it up.

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So where it to find,

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Help me to find the,

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